If You Think You are Ugly She Will Too

// June 21st, 2009 // 1 Comment » // Dating Relationships, Personal Development, Self Improvement

If You Think You are Ugly, She Will Too

The aim of this post is to block a few of those negative associations we all have about our looks in the presence of an attractive woman.

It basically comes down to this. If you think you are ugly, she is going to think it too. I’m pretty sure we’ve all been through this field of thinking. Unless you’re incredibly good looking in which case; feel free to leave this post now and return to your straightener’s.

Acceptance

Instead of allowing physical looks to dictate decisions we should instead practice acceptance. Accepting such things allows us to see them in their true form, which on most occasions is much less than we originally thought, in terms of size.

To accept our physical appearance we’ll first needs to understand what we can and cannot change about ourselves. I had rather bad acne as a teenager which burdened my confidence and ruined many a Saturday night on the town. I eventually got my testicles together and realised that acne is a very common condition and therefore quite reversible.

Accepting my acne as a changeable situation I began scribbling together a half hearted list of other physical imperfections that I could change. The list creation took a matter of minutes yet the fulfilment took months. That’s the next step to acceptance – write a list of characteristics you can change, and then change them.

The things we cannot change simply need to be forgotten about. There’s no need to waste time on things we cannot change or improve, drop them and brush them aside and focus only on what we can change, which you’ll see is quite a lot.

Once I’d listed acne as a changeable characteristic of what I believed made me feel unconfident with my physical appearance I set out researching what I could do to choke the little buggers off my skin. Surprisingly enough, the answer was obvious – seeing my local GP.

After a short visit I was reinforced with the notion that acne was a very curable and common condition that wouldn’t plague me much longer after I’ve finished a batch of tablets. I proceeded and eventually won the fight which instantly increased my confidence to an unimaginative level.

You can increase your confidence in the exact same way using your list of change and change not’s. Once you’ve focused and removed your change list by completing each one you can begin focusing a little more on your change-not’s which can be buried with some very attractive knowledge regarding how women perceive men and what drives attraction mechanisms.

Being good looking is not important for men

That’s right; a man does not need to be physically attractive to attract an attractive woman (mouthful?). To explain this thoroughly before I get bombarded with comments I’ll enlist the aid of evolutionary biology.

Animals in every generation have random genetic variation, and those animals whose genes are best suited for their environment tend to do a little better, on average, than other members of their species. Over time, the advantage of doing “a little better” becomes compounded, and the nature of the species changes.

Seen in this way, each generation is a competition between different genetic make-ups. The competition takes place extremely slowly, but evolutionary time is very long. Assuming 30 years per generation, each million years allows for over 33,000 rounds of Darwin’s game.

Most of our genetic make-up today is a result of genetic mutations that have come from previous generations. Each mutation that gives an advantage wins out over time.

Success in evolutionary terms can be seen as –

• Surviving until he or she is old enough to have offspring of their own
• Having access to sex partners, to mate with
• Reproducing frequently
• Being able to protect and raise their offspring efficiently

Being good looking does not dictate any of the above items, only aids the endeavour. Instead women look for –

Health -

• Social Intuition
• Humour

Attributes -

• Status
• Wealth

Congruence -

• Pre-selected
• Challenging
• Confident

just believe me when I say men’s looks aren’t important to women. In fact 80% of the attraction process with men and women comes from the above list in a combination of health, attributes and congruence leaving a petty 20% to physical looks.

To be completely honest, you could be Quasimodo, but if you have the characteristics present in your personality that women desire, you will be James Bond.

Moving on

With the changes made and acceptance granted with the change-not’s you are on your way to becoming an extremely confident man who’ll never need to mutter the world ugly again.

Hopefully I’ve met the aim of the post and shot down a few of your inner negative associations to do with physical looks and helped replace a few with a more positive, reinforced version of reality. Whatever the case may be, it’s time for you to have fun and start mingling together a change list to actively move ahead in your quest for attractive women.

Craig is a 22-year-old student currently studying psychology at Bournemouth University. He runs a self improvement blog and community filled with useful advice. His main aim is to help people exceed their expectations and reach their true potential.

Subscribe to his RSS and follow him on Twitter to keep up-to date with his articles and blog posts.

The Worlds 8 Worst Handshakes

// June 21st, 2009 // No Comments » // Dating Relationships, Entrepreneurship, Leadership, NLP Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Personal Development, Self Improvement

In this article you will see some truly bad handshakes. You’ll be taken through a list of the very worst handshakes that exist, be ready to cringe.

Here are 8 of the world’s worst handshakes, they are the most annoying and disliked handshakes and their variations. Avoid them at all costs or it could cost you a job, friendship or business relationship.

The handshake is extremely important in a business situation so avoid giving a bad handshake at all costs. Reading this article will alert you to worst handshakes and tell you if you give a bad handshake or not.

8. The Pump Handle Handshake

Credibility Rating: 4/10

With strong rural overtones, the pumper grabs the hand of the pumpee and commences an energetic and rhythmic series of rapid vertical strokes. While up to seven pumps is acceptable, some pumpers continue to pump uncontrollably as if they are trying to draw water from the pumpee.

Occasionally, the pumper will cease pumping but continue to hold the receiver’s hand to prevent their escape and, interestingly, few people try to pull their hand away. The act of being physically connected seems to weaken our resolve to retreat.

7. The Vice Handshake

Credibility Rating: 4/10

This quietly persuasive style is a favourite of men in business and reveals a desire to dominate and assume early control of the relationship or put people in their place. The palm is presented in the down position with one sharp downward pump followed by two or three vigorous return strokes and a grip that can even stop blood flow to the hand. Sometimes it will be used by a person who feels weak and fears they will be dominated by others.

If you are guilty of giving this handshake, I invite you to skip straight to the bottom in order to learn how to give a correct handshake, so you can relieve yourself. Then skip back up and read more of the worst handshakes. Just to make sure you don’t give any other bad handshakes.

6. The Stiff-Arm Thrust Handshake

Credibility Rating: 3/10

Like the Palm-Down Thrust, the Stiff-Arm Thrust tends to be used by aggressive types and its main purpose is to keep you at a distance and away from their personal space. It’s also used by people raised in rural areas, who have larger personal space needs and want to protect their territory.

These people will even lean forward or balance on one foot to keep their distance when delivering a Stiff-Arm Thrust.

5. The Socket-Wrencher Handshake

Credibility Rating: 3/10

A popular choice of power players and common cause of watering eyes and, in extreme cases, torn ligaments. This is the father of the Bent-Arm-Pull-In, and involves forcefully gripping the receiver’s outstretched palm, then simultaneously applying a sharp reverse thrust, attempting to drag the receiver into the initiator’s territory. This results in loss of balance and gets the relationship off on the wrong foot.

Pulling the receiver into the initiator’s territory can mean one of three things: first, the initiator is an insecure type who feels safe only within his own personal space; second, the initiator is from a culture that has smaller space needs; or third, he wants to control you by pulling you off balance. Either way, he wants the encounter to be on his terms.

4. The Finger-Tip Grab Handshake

Credibility Rating: 2/10

A common occurrence in male—female greetings, the Finger-Tip Grab is a handshake that missed the mark and the user mistakenly grabs the other person’s fingers. Even though the initiator may seem to have an enthusiastic attitude towards the receiver, he in fact lacks confidence in himself. In these circumstances, the main aim of the Finger-Tip Grab is to keep the receiver at a comfortable distance. The Finger-Tip Grab can also result from personal space differences between the people in the handshake. This could happen if one person’s intimate space was two feet (60cm) and the other’s was three feet (90cm), the latter stands further back during greeting so the hands don’t connect properly.

If this happens to you, take the other person’s right hand with your left and place it correctly in your right hand and say, with a smile ‘Let’s try that again!’ and shake hands equally. This builds your credibilitybecause you are telling the other person that you think they are important enough for you to get it right.

3. The Dutch Treat Handshake

Credibility Rating: 2/10

Being somewhat vegetarian in approach, this handshake has its origins in the Netherlands, where a person can be accused of ‘Geeft ‘n hand als bosje worteljes’ meaning ‘Giving a handshake like a bunch of carrots’. It’s a distant relative of the Wet Fish but stiffer and less clammy to the touch.

2. The Wet Fish Handshake

Credibility Rating: 1/10

Few greetings are as uninviting as the Wet Fish, particularly when the hand is cold or clammy.The soft, placid feel of the Wet Fish makes it universally unpopular and most people associate it with weak character, mainly because of the ease with which the palm can be turned over. It is read by the receiver as a lack of commitment to the encounter, but there may be cultural or other implications – in some Asian and African cultures a limp handshake is the norm and a firm handshake can be seen as offensive. Also, one in twenty people suffer from a condition called hyperhydrosis, which is a genetic condition that causes chronic sweating. It’s wise to carry tissues or a handkerchief for mop-up strategies before any bout of handshaking.

The palms have more sweat glands than any other part of the body, which is why sweaty palms become so obvious. Surprisingly, many people who use the Wet Fish are unaware they do it so it’s wise to ask your friends to comment on your handshake style before deciding what you’ll use in future meetings.

1. The Bone-Crusher Handshake

Credibility Rating: 0/10

A second cousin to the Vice, the Bone-Crusher is the most feared of all handshakes as it leaves an indelible memory on the recipient’s mind and fingers and impresses no one other than the initiator. The Bone-Crusher is the trademark of the overly aggressive personality who, without warning, seizes the early advantage and attempts to demoralise his opponent by grinding his knuckles to a smooth paste. If you are female, avoid wearing rings on your right hand in business encounters as the Bone-Crusher can draw blood and leave you to open your business dealings in a state of shock.

Unfortunately, there are no effective ways to counter it. If you believe someone has done it on purpose, you could bring it to every-one’s attention by saying, ‘Ouch! That really hurt my hand. Your grip is too strong.’ This puts the advocate of the Bone-Crusher on notice not to repeat the behaviour.

The Cure to a Bad Handshake

Few people have any idea how they come across to others in initial meetings, despite the fact that most of us are aware that the first few minutes of that meeting can make or break a relationship. Take the time to practise handshake styles with your friends and colleagues and you can quickly learn how to deliver a positive handshake every time. Keeping the palms held vertical and matching the other person’s grip is usually perceived as a 10/10 handshake.

Now that you’ve reached the end of the ‘8 of the worlds worst handshakes‘ you can jump along to more related articles such as the 9 golden keys to making a great first impression, How to Get Ahead in Business and the First 20 Seconds of an Interview.

Craig is a 22-year-old student currently studying psychology at Bournemouth University. He runs a self improvement blog and communityfilled with useful advice. His main aim is to help people exceed their expectations and reach their true potential.

Subscribe to his RSS and follow him on Twitter to keep up-to date with his articles and blog posts.

Face Reading for Job Interviews

// June 21st, 2009 // 2 Comments » // Entrepreneurship, NLP Neuro-Linguistic Programming

Face Reading for Job Interviews

One of the most useful avenues of Face Reading techniques is during the job interview. Candidates can gauge the interviewer as they do not have the birth date of their future superior. Employers can use it as additional gauge of the employee in case the birth data of the employee is not accurate.

Forehead

A high, fleshy and pinkish forehead generally means that this person will achieve great sucess in hiscareer. However, if you are the superior, you may want to compare your forehead against your subordinate’s forehead in case your subordinate overshines you in your department!

Eyebrows

Sparse eyebrows indicate that the person is quite meticulous and would be useful for jobs that requires details. However, such a person is less suitable for managerial post as he has the likelihood to micro-manage. In addition, eyebrows which has hairs that are not grow in the same direction denote a state of mind that is not so clear and concise. If the 2 eyebrows are spaced too closely this person is likely to be narrow-minded or petty.

Ears

Ears that stick closely to the sides generally mean that this person is quite careful.

Nose

A high and protruding nose bridge indicates this person is quite confident on himself.

A fleshy nose indicates a kind personality. For job-seekers, this will be one good feature to keep a lookout for your prospective superior. A short nose indicates tendency to job hop and should be of interest to the employer. Lastly a visible nostril also indicates a violent personality.

Cheekbone

A squarish cheekbone generally means confidence. If you are hiring a manager or someone for a position that needs to exudes confidence when dealing with people, this will be the physical trait you need to keep a close lookout for.

Eyes

An exceedingly larger % of the whitish portion of the eye signifies the person is vengeful. Having a staff with such a physical feature may mean the workplace harmony is compromised.

Mountain Root

This is the space between the eyes and if scarred or ridden with lines means this person is likely to be embroiled in conflicts.

Lips

A thinner lower lip suggests this person is selfish and aggressive. If the work entails cooperation and team spirit, someone with this physical trait will not be suitable for such a line of work.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/interviews-articles/face-reading-for-job-interviews-722801.html

Read a Person’s Eyebrows – NLP

// June 21st, 2009 // No Comments » // NLP Neuro-Linguistic Programming

Read a Person’s Eyebrows – NLP

Face Reading (personology) and Eyebrows

The shape of the eyebrows identifies different personality traits, although most of them are related to thinking styles, still there are lots of other things that can be tracked by checking how the eyebrows look like. Take special care with women because of the cosmetics they use which can totally reshape the eyebrow and give false signatures. Below are some different shapes of eyebrows and their associated personality traits.

Eyebrow types in face reading

• Straight eyebrows (The logical): When eyebrows are like a straight line then this person is a logical thinker. If you want to convince him of something, only use logic and proofs; don’t try to convince him using emotions like saying “Hey, this is good; I feel it’s nice” instead tell him something like “It has lots of benefits, number one is bla bla and number two is bla bla bla”. Using a pen and a paper is the best way to convince such a person as you can point out all the advantages and disadvantages of the issue you are talking about.
• Meeting eyebrows (The non-stop thinker): when the eye brows are connected; when they meet each other through a bridge of hair, this person is a non-stop thinker. Such a person can’t relax; he is always thinking and evaluating everything around him. If you relate to this category, make sure you learn how to relax so as not to harm your health. That person may have sleeping problemswhen approaching a major event in his life, on account of all the thinking he does.
• Angled eyebrows (The authority seeker): You must take a great deal of care when dealing with such a person. That person, with angled eyebrows that kind of form an inverted “v” shape, is always seeking control and authority; try noticing how many presidents had angled eyebrows, you’d be surprised. Those people usually fight fiercely for authority and high status and positions. If you want to get along with this person, make him feel important; try to catch his name on your first meeting so you can use it again. motivating that person is very easy, just give him more control and make him feel that everything is depending on him.
• Thin eye brows (The sensitive): Very thin eyebrows may mean that this person is overly sensitive, especially if he has delicate facial features, like small eyes, nose or mouth. When dealing with that person, pay extra attention not to hurt him as he is more sensitive to external stimulus than other people.
• Curved eye brows (The friendly): A person with curved eyebrows (sometimes called round) is a friendly person by nature, the same as the person with round face features; round cheeks or chin. This person understands best by examples and metaphors.

http://www.2knowmyself.com/face_reading/face_reading_eyebrows

2knowmyself is, without doubt, the only complete source for face reading information on the entire internet. If you dare challenge this statement, then check the 2knowmyself’s Face reading sectionand you will discover it yourself.